40 Days of 40

Having been through this before with my husband, family members and friends, I often wondered what I would do in this situation. How would I feel?  What would I do? I have seen denial, depression, celebration and well as contemplation. Well here we are, my time has come…I am turning 40!

So as it was approaching I started to realize that all I wanted to do was CELEBRATE!! Anyone who knows me knows I am the party planner. I am the one who loves giving parties for other people. I just got over the year long journey of planning and executing my daughters Sweet 16. And before that any birthday, holiday or vacation I take as a challenge to make sure everything is perfect for everyone else. For some reason, this time, I am playing the selfish card. I am in no way altruistic but I don’t consider myself selfish either. But some reason the milestone has started me thinking about ME.  The closer I get to my birthday the more I want to celebrate. I am not sure, how or why, I just know I do.

When we are younger we think 40 means you are half dead!  Then we hear the expression “Life begins at 40” and that also sounds like a crock. Well like almost everything else in life you don’t believe it until you experience it. With this “mature” age comes reflection. You can see where you have been, what you have been through and what obstacles you have conquered. In reality a feeling of relief comes over you. There aren’t the same societal stresses that exist when you are young. You can believe in what you want to believe in, not care what people think, and you realize who and what is important.  You start to see what you have been through as not necessarily hardships but life experiences and lessons learned.

Part of my issue is also that I have no feeling of being “old”. It seems like yesterday to me that I was in high school thinking about my future. Now here I am again realizing there is so much more future ahead that I am in the same position of “thinking” about my future. I still feel like there is so much ahead and so much to look forward to doing and planning. Feeling old only comes into play when my teenage daughter points out my “inappropriate” actions, words, and/or taste in clothes, shoes, music, movies etc. In fact I still feel weird being called “Mrs.” even though I have been married over 18 years. So I will have to see my new badge number of 40 as a new chapter in my life, not as the beginning of the end of it. Do things just because I can, leave behind anxieties and fears, take the time to celebrate life because life is not a race. It is a stroll through many adventures, good or bad, fun or a drag, easy or hard, happy or sad.

So now I have decided to have my “40 DAYS OF 40”. My birthday is actually October 30th, but I was invited to celebrate my birthday by a family member on Sunday November 11th for dinner and a Broadway show so I am counting that as Day 40. That makes Wednesday October 3rd, Day 1. As of that day I am making everyday a celebration and invite anyone to join me. I would like to do something every day to remind me that your life is what you make of it NOW. It is not to dwell on what is gone or in the past but what is my “present” or a gift to myself. So for those 40 days I invite anyone and everyone to join me, literally and figuratively.  I am open to breakfast, brunch, lunch, dinner ,drinks, coffee (I don’t drink coffee but would still go), fro yo, club, bar, movie, bowling, city, show, comedy club, casino, a walk, shopping, game night, movie night, video games, or just sitting around the fire pit, or whatever comes up. I will be posting on my facebook some events coming up that I would like to do and hopefully get people to join my movement. I would love to share it with anyone and everyone,  especially if you are my age and can really appreciate what it is I am going through. Even if you can’t personally be with me please remember what I said and do it for yourself.  So call me selfish, call me crazy, you can even call me old…….just call me!!!

Also for anyone who has not seen the trailer for the movie coming out in December, “This is 40”, I definitely want my journey of turning 40 to continue by going to see that movie. Go to http://www.thisis40movie.com/ to see the trailer!! And wait for December and lets all go and laugh at the ridiculousness of this age and what is represents!!